I think that both the Owner and your Strata Manager may be confusing the procedures for Executive Committee Meetings, where non-members including Owners cannot participate without the agreement of the Committee, with those for General Meetings – because so far as I’m aware there’s nothing prescribed in the NSW Strata Schemes Management Act (1996) that would prevent your husband from speaking (but not voting) during the proceedings of a General Meeting.
Whilst the Strata Manager (Chair) would certainly be able to rule your husband out-of-order if his comments were in their opinion obstructing the procedures of the Meeting, there’s nothing to prevent his reasoned participation, so if the latter was the case then I believe that what your unfriendly Owner requested and your Strata Manager agreed to was incorrect.
You could of course grant your Proxy to your husband for the next General Meeting if you feel that he can better express your jointly held views.